Today’s session is about how to survive (and thrive) with your other half under your feet all day

Every relationship system (whether a family, group of flat mates or work team) creates particular  ways of being with each other. We might call it group culture or recognise it through family idiosyncrasies. One of the key factors in establishing these patterns is how we balance our desire for space and separateness with our desire for connection and intimacy.

Lockdowns mean that our typical methods of creating space and choosing intimacy have been whipped away.

So, if you are feeling claustrophobic watch this video and then

  1. Identify your “elastic band” dance – Do you need more space or greater contact? How is it getting more extreme in lockdown? How are you co-creating this with your partner?
  2. Connect & offer compassion to where you are right now – It’s hard to get a grip on our behaviours if we haven’t connected with the emotion that’s driving them. You might use the Focusing skills from Session 4 or using the journaling resource I’ve just uploaded to the group.
  3. Take a step of differentiation – Have a chat with your partner. Aim to clarify what you need and listen with curiosity about what your partner needs.

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See you next session,